Waiting Is a Hard Thing

It really is a fact of life, waiting that is. We all have to wait for one thing or another just about every day. Some are simple waits while others are more challenging. For instance, we wait for the coffee to make, wait in line at the store, wait for the red light to change, wait for the return of our family, wait for a favorite program on TV, wait for dinner to get ready, wait for a turn in the bathroom and a multitude of waits longer than I have time for. I am sure each of us have certain waits that are not a big deal to us and another list that will make us climb the wall or just go a little nutty. One that most moms can relate to is the 9 month wait we have gone through in order to hold our precious children in our arms. For the first time mom it goes by about the speed of molasses in the winter time. Those who have little ones already, the wait goes by way to fast to be ready for the next little blessing to arrive. Such is life. Much of it is a hurry up and wait game that is repeated over and over.

You would think that a 5 month pregnancy is nothing compared to a 9 month or even an 11 month one (that's another story). A "piece of cake", "in no time at all, really", "fly by before you know it" are some frequently used phrases we have either said ourselves or have had spoken to us at one time or another. Well, let me tell you waiting for my sons to be born was a piece of cake and flew by quickly, as I enjoyed both of my "waiting times" for them. On the other hand waiting these last 5 months for some baby goats would have turned my hair grey if it wasn't already so. It has been a struggle for me.

Anna' relaxed, so why aren't I?

Waiting on a mom who doesn't speak your language and does things her own way (not by the book) is an act of sheer frustration for this first time goat owner. Anna has been due to kid by our best guess since Christmas eve. Not knowing when she became pregnant left us at a disadvantage in knowing when she would actually deliver. By all accounts from the previous owners she was with "kid" when we bought her from them. WRONG! She has now surpassed those delivery dates and a few more. That was almost a month ago!

Amber & Sugar

Needless to say at the time she joined our family, we were more focused on the breeding of the two does we already had. So we didn't watch her as closely, after all she was already pregnant, right? Anna was the first to show off her new bulging figure, so she must be pregnant. Anna gave us some early signs of impending births; pelvic ligaments gone, belly dropping, losing the mucus plug (Jan 1st), hollowing out on her sides, udder filling and a few subtle ones I just happen to see. So she is really close. Right? Added all up it spoke of her being near her "time" and the waiting was over. Wrong again.

(Yes, that is my shadow in the picture, not to good at taking them, huh?)

Everyday since before Christmas we have been doing the maternity watch. Looking for signs of early labor contractions. I have been watching so closely, my eyes are tired from looking. We have family members calling every few days asking "do we have babies yet"? Nope! We were beginning to think maybe she really wasn't pregnant after all, just a little fat around the edges. We even put her in the kidding pen over 2 weeks ago, because she must be close. Look at all the signs the books and others have said to watch for. I just let her out this past Wednesday as there doesn't seem to be any indication that she will kid soon. Plus I needed to freshen it up for when she does go into labor. I keep telling every one that I think she has her legs crossed on purpose.

Her udder taking shape

I think she is toying with me, by giving a tiny sign here and another one there. Saying in earnest that even she doesn't know for sure when the kids will make their entrance. Like today, she has been acting weird like every other day, so I frequently look out the windows to check on her where abouts. Even through the binoculars I can tell she looks like she has a fuller udder and paws at the ground some (2nd day in a row). So I go down to check on her, maybe she is having the start of labor contractions. She stands there and looks back at me with a "So?". But as I watch, I see something I haven't seen in weeks, movement, small protrusions on her side, rolling against the skin. Babies, I see babies moving. So she is pregnant! Not that I really doubted it, just got tired of waiting. I marvel at the wonder of it all and think about their arrival some day soon (I hope). Then I think does she feel the movement within her and instinctively know that it's her babies moving? Or pardon my bluntness, does she just let the movement pass by and figure it was just gas. (No pun intended). We as humans can marvel at the life within us when we are pregnant, we long to hold that child that flutters under the surface of our bellies and our hearts, we feel a connection to our unborn. As I sat and watched her for a few minutes I realized it makes the waiting worthwhile, but oh so much harder. I have been following some other goat owner's blog of lately and get excited and dare I say a little jealous at their new arrivals. If you want to see some cute newborns go check out Granny's Best at http://grannysbest.blogspot.com/2010/01/kidding-myrtles-surprise.html. She has new, as in less than 24 hours old nubian babies. Hope ours are just as cute as Myrtle's are.

It is all in God's hands and nature follows a beat set by Him alone. So the waiting will continue and I will have to exercise patience in it.

Deborah

P.S. When putting the girls to bed for the night, I noticed Anna's udder is filling up more. Can now be seen protruding from behind her legs. Nothing like the picture above taken a couple of days ago. This means she is making lots of yummy milk to nurse her babies with. Soooooo, does this mean they will be here soon? Before morning? Tomorrow? This weekend? So much for waiting with patience.

It's Friday

Rain is falling with heavier showers to come. I let Anna and Sugar out of the kidding pens last night. Neither are looking like impending labor is near. I keep wondering about Anna especially. She is almost a month past her due date. She was looking closer to birthing 20 days ago. With all the research in books and online it is hard to know what to do. Questions and conflicting thoughts circle through my head daily. I hope it was not a mistake leaving them out for the night. Bad weather and a strong willed goat is not a good combination. Add to that labor and she would be very difficult to get back in the kidding pen. Guess I will find out when I go down to the barn.



I had to put up another Roo yesterday as there was fighting between 2 Welsummers. One was bloody and injured to the point, I don't know if he will make it. And it was the very one we were considering using as our breeder in the Spring, to add to our flock some more of these beautiful birds. I even had someone interested in trading me some hens for one of them. Now I will have to wait and see if I will even have one to trade. It appears from what I have been told we could possibly have some viral illness in our flock. But it only seems to be affecting the roosters, none of the hens are showing any signs. Which is good, we need all the lovely eggs that they are laying.

Life continues,

Deborah

Routine Changes

I've been enjoying my new morning routine changes. Taking time to write, read devotionals and ponder the day has proved to slow my thinking and redirect my focus. I am truly sitting more in a relaxed frame of mind. The rush to get on the computer feeling has just about left me. Staying caught up in any one area to the neglect of another is not good. Balance is needed in every area in order for the workings of life to run smoothly. When I do get on it, I actually read through and leave comments on several favorite blogs. Which I am sure will inspire me to keep up to date on my own blog entries on a more timely manner. Thanks for all the friends who take the time to comment on a post of mine and who inspire me with one of theirs.

Crocheting kid coats (baby goat, not human) has been great therapy for me as we wait for Anna to give birth. With her being WAY past "our" projected date is cause enough for me to "fret" a little. Working on them has kept my hands busy and my mind occupied somewhat. Besides creating cute sweaters for our future babies. After trying several suggested patterns, that didn't work out for me. I am using a simple dog sweater pattern, that is so simple that after making one, you can do multiples without looking at the directions. It is easily altered too. Making it a great option for any size goat, young or old. Plans are that we will try to complete the last kidding stall today. So if the girls decide to do a "group thing", we will be ready for them. There are several things still needed for my kidding kit. Researching the options to getting them may be good use of my computer time today. Starting out for the first time leaves us with needing everything! So finding the best prices and getting quickly to boot is a prudent thing to do. Should be able to purchase a few items at the TSC, tomorrow on my grocery and errand day.

I love the color, this left over yarn will make some spiffy coats for the babies.



I think I may look up the moon phases for this month. Just to see if it could have any bearing on their deliveries. So many farmers plant and harvest by the moon phases. I know my grandfather did when he was farming back in the 30's,40's, 50's and up to his death. There is lots of information to be had in the Farmer's Almanac for those interested.

Today is suppose to be a sunny, warm day - perfect weather for fueling Spring fever! That is if the heavy morning fog will ever lift. At least the foggy funk around my heart and mind is lifting with the routine changes taking place.

Deborah

A Letter from a Father

Read this in a devotional, the author unknown and in light of my recent thoughts knew it's timing was no mistake. I would like to share it with you, may it bring you comfort and direction in your life.

"Dear Child,

Before you were even born, I knew what every single one of your days was going to be like. (Psalm 139:16) Whatever circumstances you face in your life are not going to surprise Me. I have everything you will need, and I will walk you through every step of the way.

When you feel helpless and worried, let that be a sign to you that you need to turn to Me. I am your refuge and strength, a helper who is always found in times of trouble. (Psalm46:1)

When you worry, dear one, know that it robs you of the present. Worry also robs you of satisfaction. When you are worried, it's so difficult to be thankful and realize how I have taken care of you. Worry displaces thanksgiving in your heart.

Come to Me. You don't have to strive and strain to make things happen. My plans for your life is a good one. All I've asked you to do is to trust Me. I'll walk with you step by step. There's nothing that we can't tackle together.

I don't promise that life will be easy, but in the hard times, turn to Me ~ you will find Me there ready to hold you while your world shakes. I will protect you. I will carry you if you need carrying. I will hold your hand and walk you through it all.

Don't worry about the possible hard times that may or may not come. When they do come, you and I will face them together. (Isaiah 43:12) I will give you everything you need. Though you may stumble, you will not fall because I will uphold you with My hand. (Psalm 37:23-24)

It makes Me sad when you stress and strain and worry about things I have promised I will provide. I have your life covered ~ down to the tiniest detail.

I love you. Please trust Me."

Your Father